Friday, January 16, 2009


Yesterday morning I watched Hilary's farewell speech to the Senate. She reflected on the past eight years, being a brand-new Senator during 9/11, on the challenges she has faced, the successes that have occurred, and as she was speaking I got a little teary. I felt so proud to know and love New York as much as I do, and I felt like a real New Yorker. [This is a feeling I am somewhat oriented towards listening to since I have been such a tumbleweed/gypsy lately.]
Yesterday afternoon I followed the news on the US Airways flight and the 'hero of the Hudson' (Why is the NYPost so brilliant with its headlines?!) and I felt moved to tears again.
Watching Bloomberg's press conference this morning-- again-- MOVED. As the Mayor put it-- we should all be grateful and go forth into the day with a smile on our faces...
Now, to paraphrase passenger Vince Spera--'if anything bad has to happen to me or anyone I love-- I pray that it happens in the great city of New York.'

Friday, January 9, 2009

limb loss

Sometimes I take my limbs for granted. I forget how much they do for me, how much they mean to me, how they effect me and other people. Once I really was within an actual window of possibility as far as losing an arm. One of the nights in the hospital a loved one had a conversation with my arm over the phone. Since I moved the phone to the area just above my elbow and I don't have speakerphone I couldn't hear what was said-- but I imagine it was something along the lines of "I love you, arm. I love all that you are, arm. Get well soon, arm... so you can go back to being your true arm self." Maybe?
I lost my whole hard drive this week. I actually am in mourning. I haven't been able to fall asleep at night as I think of all the things I lost. I wake up in a sweat in the middle of the night with an image in my head of a photo that I took-- that is gone now. Or some writing I have been working on. Some video. Actually about 1200 photos... I think I am freaked out because the past means a lot to me-- maybe more than is normal or it should. I pride myself on remembering things, moments, experiences-- but I notice my memory is a lot foggier than it was a couple years ago.
Also, because the past nine months have been so important to me. I am sad to have lost almost all documentation of my adventures, projects, etc.
I don't want to be one of those people who has to check in with the electronic device in their pocket every time there is a moment of idleness. I don't want to be a pack rat or someone who doesn't have perspective about material possessions. At the moment though, it's still raw.
And the great irony, well-- wouldn't you know what I was doing when my old pal gave out-- the hard drive had just started sending my whole nine months over to the external hard drive... when, KAPUT.
RIP my first new wave Mac. I will miss you. I appreciate all that you held for me-- even if it was ephemeral.
Anyway though, it's not so bad. On New Year's Eve an older couple who lived near my aunt and uncle lost the last 50 years of their life. It all went up in a blaze.
Happy New Year everyone.

Friday, January 2, 2009

how might it have been any different?

In my opinion, the only way to really move forward is to move THROUGH. I'm pretty sure there was a quote to that effect I saw on the wall in some middle-school classroom-- I vaguely remember referencing it here in fact... but sure enough-- it has stood the test of (some) time and some experience-- and in a variety of different arenas of my life.

You might not have pegged me or this blog as a likely participant in the conversation on the financial crisis and economics-- but since I am a firm believer in understanding a thing BY discussing it... and I want to explore any element of my or others' lives that may be of interest to me, and hopefully others'-- I think the topic itself is ripe for the blog-block.

Mostly though.. I want to say--
READ this article by Michael Lewis from Portfolio called
"The End".

I was turned on to it by David Brook's editorial "The Sidney Awards" in yesterday's NYTime-- an editorial which in and of itself-- on the constant and increasingly shorter-forminification of all things-- is FABULOUS and I also strongly recommend.

Lewis' editorial is great and one of the most concise forays into the current economic crisis I have read. It is also makes a fascinating point on the almost inevitability of America's current financial situation and the correlation between the questionable but status-quo morality practiced in the name of 'Capitalism' in America, as well as our obsession with re-invention, change, all things "new," and youth. I first remember being concerned during one of George W. Bush's State of the Union speeches fairly early on-- he talked about how there were more people buying houses than ever. That struck me as strange-- who were these people, and how on Earth could they afford it? Everyone I knew had less money than ever before and couldn't even afford their rent-- and these were all college-educated working professionals! Also, the proliferation of the freeway exit ramp posters encouraging everyone and their sister to "Buy a House! No money down!!" seemed oddly makeshift and casual for so serious an undertaking as buying a house has always seemed to be to me...