A few weeks ago the world lost a great, great, hilarious, generous, kind, thoughtful, brilliant STAR. I was lucky enough to share the stage with Philip in Ivona, Princess of Burgundia at Sacred Fools in May & June 2005 and at Soop Sok in Koreatown at my 25th birthday. We sang Time after Time and any time anyone else sang all night Philip pressed the 'applause' button on the console like it was his job. The birthday card he wrote said "get outta my dreams and into my car" and he called his beat-up old car the "pussy wagon." The time that we really knew each other was short-- but quality. Every time I saw him at the theater, or around town, he was ready with a big hug, a smile, and his brawny wit. I too loved spotting him on tv because it made me happy to know Philip was getting paid for what he was so brilliant at... He was so unique, and so comfortable in his own skin. As my friend, and another friend of Philip's said: "you can never know what a person's life is truly like. You can know what they do and how they spend some or even much of their time. But you don't ever know the pain some people feel. Deep, constant pain. It's impossible to understand. has got to be one of the greatest mysteries of life - how someone can get to such a low place where they do not want to exist in this world anymore."
I just wish I could have seen Philip at least one more time.
I kept thinking of Newbs when I heard this song Skinny Love by Bon Iver and I keep looking at pictures of him, and the amazing things people have said on his facebook page. I wonder if he knew how much people love him. I wonder if it would have changed anything. I put together this little video so some of the images and words would be in one place. My friend Bob and I talked a lot about how weird what happens to someone's facebook page is when they die. I don't know-- for some reason going there has been sort of comforting to me. He was a bright bright light and just thinking of him makes me feel a little brighter.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
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