Saturday, July 16, 2011

ocularis

This morning I woke up and I couldn't see. Literally. Everything was blurry and I wasn't even hungover or headache-ridden.
I rubbed my eyes and gave myself a series of eye tests, splashed water on my eyes, asked myself if I was 'being dramatic' or hyper again and again, went for a run to make sure it wasn't grogginess, and then... I got a ride to the hospital.
When I was 5-- a few days after seeing a production of The Miracle Worker I'm pretty sure-- I kind of faked being blind one day. I think I didn't want to go to school, and I was half-curious if I could pull it off-- and in some deranged way I almost successfully convinced myself that if I was going down this road it could only mean I really was going blind. Or at least that was a symptom of something. I put my shoes on the wrong feet. I don't remember how conscious I was of these things, how shotty my vision was if at all, but I remember the part of the mid-morning, after several hours in the ER, when I sort of got bored and suddenly regained the power of sight. I remember feeling bad that my mom was so worried. But it was also a really interesting experiment.
Today was not an experiment. The ground, people's faces, and street signs were unrecognizable to me. In order to write notes to the actors I made the words on my computer 300% and held it inches from my face.
At the hospital I got a gown, a CT scan, and some headache medicine. They think it was an ocular migraine. Not serious at all. I'm glad I had it checked out and also that my worst fears (which flashed before my blurry eyes as I was being wheeled on a gurney into the CT machine) of going blind are not true. I really like seeing.
Also, here's a great article about another one of my favorites. Who happens to be a lady.
Miranda, I really think we would be bosom buddies.

1 comment:

Adam Eli Clem said...

Glad you're okay. Your childhood prank reminds me of The Man Who Saw Everything Twice in Heller's "Catch-22." Yossarian imitates his malady, until the Man Who Saw Everything Twice dies, and Yossarian announces that he sees everything once.